Monday 8 June

Tina does 2 school visits including a senior management meeting that goes to 5.30pm. I relax and get organised. As I am typing this I am watching the movie “Biggles”. I read dozens of Biggles books when I was young. I even remember having to take a broken book to Form 3 art class in 1967 to learn book binding and I took a Biggles omnibus.

Later … I have finished the movie and it was appalling! A travesty on a number of levels!!! It involves time travel so Biggles is in modern times and he sees a helicopter. Being told he can’t fly one he replies, “If you can fly a Sopwith Camel you can fly anything”.

Later, “Don’t worry old chap, think of England”

Believe it or not the helicopter (called a Windmill by Bertie, Algy and Ginger) goes back in time to World War I to attack the German’s secret weapon (a sound machine) that’s going to win the war for them!!!

Get to free internet at local library.

More from “Must Try Harder – The Very Worst Best Howlers By Schoolchildren”:
Politics
- Karl Marx’s Communist Fiesta was very important
- When Caesar was assassinated, he is reported to have said, “Me too, Brutus!”
- King John ground the people down by heavy taxis
- The USA and USSR became global in power, but Europe remained incontinent
- President Carter faced the Iran Hostess Crisis
- When Gorbachev became top Russian the USSR shifted to a new planet of existance
Animals
- sharks were infecting the area, a one of them was a non-swimmer
- a Mayor is a horse
- Benjamin Franklin discovered electricity by rubbing two cats backwards and declared, “A horse divided against itself cannot stand”
- To keep milk from turning sour keep it in the cow
- Herrings go about in the sea in shawls
- Anthroapologists have proved that when animals were not available the people ate nuts and barrys
- Men are mammals and women are femammals
- The adder is a poisonous snack
- An octogenarian is an animal which has eight young at birth
- The largest mammals are found in the sea because there is nowhere else to put them